Monday, November 2, 2009

Post Halloween Guest Post: Chuck or Treat or Welcome to My Nightmare

"Relax and have a seat, let us get you a drink. You'll need it..."

Photo and caption, by Marilyn Smith


CooKoo Charlie the Cannibal Clown is in the house.
While the witches brew, I'll cook my stew
a little pigs feet (swine or human) one brown mouse
Hey, be thankful one of the ingredients isn't you.

This is my first appearance on the well-bled, I mean Well-Read Donkey. And it truly is a horror, I mean honor.

I want to take this moment to talk to you about monsters.

Dracula, Frankenstein's monster, the Wolfman and that amphibious abomination, the Creature from the Black Lagoon. I love how he swims in sync with the ladies. Grace with gills. Rage that kills. A perfect combination.

Anyway, these are the monsters of the past. Today we have Freddy, Michael Myers, Chucky and...Pumpkinhead!

Good or bad, monsters make an impression on all of us. There's nothing like a cool, scary as hell, monster that invades your sleep and terrorizes you until you wake up screaming with your sheets soaking in sweat.

Although, truth be told, nothing scares old CooKoo. Hell, I'd make Freddy whimper like a whipped pup.

Way before Hollywood silver-screened monsters and writers put their nightmarish visions on the printed page, humanity has gone to bed with horror stories. Frightening folklore is in every culture. It's a given, no matter where you're livin', where there are people, there are monster tales.

Which leads me to an amazing book by Jonathan Maberry, Bram Stoker award winning author of the chilling Pine Deep trilogy, and David F. Kramer. They Bite Endless Cravings of Supernatural Predators is a copious, cultural compendium of creepy creatures that should fuel your inflamed imagination. Lurking and preying in these predatory pages are vampires, werewolves, hell hounds, seducers and many more monsters of mayhem.

Point is: whether you're a budding novelist searching for inspiration or an average Joe, I prefer sloppy Joes, although they don't have to be Joes, they can be Franks, Chucks or whomever, leisurely scanning the sections for entertain and education.

Me, I'm always looking for new ways to stir up my ravenous repertoire.
Stir it up; ...Little darlin! Eh, Bob.

Oh, hey, before I vamoose, to cook livers and goose, I want to make sure you check out my video CooKoo The Clown reviews Pilo Family Circus, by Will Elliot and Maneater, by Thomas Emson.

I also want to give a shout out to John Ray whose savory directional and editorial skills made this eerie endeavor a truly appetizing artform.

Maybe I'll invite him over for dinner. Don't worry John Ray, I actually won't have you for dinner. I'll cook you up something special...but I won't tell you everything that's in the pot.


Text written by Chuck Perunko

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